The Sex Thread: AKA "What are you wearing right now? ;)" (NC-17)

[RoninAngel]

Here. 


(NSFW porno; obviously    http://tour.sapphicerotica.com/?nats=MTA5NTozOjE,0,0,0,0   )

[Pozf]

Borrrring -.-... also there are much better sites if you want videos >.>; I might know of a few from friends sending me random shit. (not literally <.<)

Edit: I don't know why I know these site names actually... they just kind of appear in my memory.

[akashayi]

I have my own favorite sites as well ^^

Not exactly the best time for porninating, though.

[Pozf]

There is a right and wrong time to be porninating?

[RoninAngel]

Oh. It's not my favorite. The content is my favorite. 

But it's a fucking pay site.  

I often try to get that site's content without paying for it (with mixed results.  )

@Pozf: Clearly. like were I am, at the computer lab  . Or if for some crazy reason you want to focus on, like, anything else. 

[Pozf]

Well there are clearly wrong PLaces to be doing it. I just didn't thing there was a wrong time per say.

[RoninAngel]

Well in that case- what about the time you should be getting up to leave the house- clearly a little-

A date with Palmela Handerson
Acting out the grapes of wrath
Backing your fist
Bang yourself
Beat the beaver
Beating my meat
Beating the bishop
Bop the bologna
Choking the chicken
Clap your clit
Clean the bean
Clicking the mouse
Dating Hannie Palmer
Diddle my skittle
Diddling
Donald trump firing his apprentice
Double clicking the mouse
Fiction friction
Fire off some knuckle-children
Five finger shuffle
Flickin’ the kitten
Flicking the bean
Flog the dolphin
Fucking yourself
Getting trigger happy
Going fishing with the man in the boat
Going to the palm prom
Greasin’ the gash
Hand to gland combat
Having a knee trembler
Hit the slit
Hitchhike To The Sky
Holding your sausage hostage
Indiana Jones finding a sweet dig
Jacking off
Jerkin the gerkin
Jerking off
Jibber jab
Jilling off
Let the beaver swim
Lubing the tube
Making it snow
Making my girl happy
Making stomach pancakes
Milking the cow
One handed baseball
Painting the ceiling
Pet the poodle
Petting the kitty
Playing air guitar naked
Playing pocket pool
Playing tug of war with the cyclops
Pole dancing
Polishing the pearl
Pumping the keg
Revving the engine
Roughing up the suspect
Rub the nub
Rubbing one out
Rubbing Rob Reiner
Ruin your eyesight
Scrach and sniff
Scraping off the scabs
Scratch n’ sniff
Shake and steak
Shuffle your Ipod
Slam the clam
Slapping the salami
Slicking Willie
Spanking the monkey
Spinnin’ a record
Squishing the squidgie
Stroking it
Stroking the one-eyed snake
Taking care of my business
Tapping the wookie on the head
Thinking of your mom
Tick the taco
Tickle your pickle
Turning Japanese
Two-finger tango
Visit from the five-fingered aunty
Visiting Rosy Palms and her five sisters
Walking the dog
Wax on, whack off
Whippin off a batch
Wrestling the one eyed monster

is not indicitive of running errands, just idicitive of sleeping.

By the way, funest google ever! 

http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&rls=com.microsoft:en-us&ei=9dPkSb3OOKGEtAPr1P2nCQ&sa=X&oi=spell&resnum=1&ct=result&cd=1&q=euphemisms+for+masturbating&spell=1

[akashayi]

Well, for instance: Right now is Lunchinating time. Enjoying my food! Clearly no time to be choking the bishop.

[Pozf]

Wai.. wha... but... you... fe.... Blargh....

Anyway I thought you enjoyed a little food play.

[RoninAngel]

Yes! Wait for lunch to be over, then masturbate!  

[Pozf]

What is it rude or something to masturbate and eat at the same time? I can only assume it takes a decent amount of coordination. Then again I suppose cross contamination would be very bad thing.

[akashayi]

Unless it's a hot naked girl covered in sushi, food play with play would be better when horny, not hungry. Right now, I'm on the hungry side of my emotions. After lunch I can go back to being horny ;P

[Pozf]

What can't be both at once?

[akashayi]

Only when Brion is involved....

...delicious....lobster meat.....

[Pozf]

I've tried lobster a bunch and I always think I'm gonna like it... but I never do. I blame Brion.

Edit: Right no going off track gotta keep this sexy... Uhm. Yea I got nothing sorry, no sexyness here.

[Oddball]

not really feeling sexy jsut now had too much cherry coke

[Emp_Dragon]

Well, I've been living in involountary celibacy for a couple of months shy of a year now... so I've got a slight issue with pent-up desire that will most likely force itself to the surface first proper chance it gets.

[UmberIsSexy]

Make sure you post all related stories here E_D.

[RoninAngel]

What is it rude or something to masturbate and eat at the same time? I can only assume it takes a decent amount of coordination. Then again I suppose cross contamination would be very bad thing.

Yes. Just ask Eminem. Jerking off in the French Fries is genrally frowned upon by McDonald's managers everywhere. God knows why. 

W.K. Kellog, the inventer of Kellog's Corn Flakes famously hated masturbation. He even evented a device to help stop babies from touching themselves in their sleep. So in honour of Mr. Kellog (or perhaps the opposet), everyone should practice "hand to gland combat" at least once while eating Kellogs Corn Flakes. 

[RoninAngel]

Like what... I mean it's Rock Band. I don't even think there are any sexy songs for the game.

hrmmm.... idk some people might find some of the songs sexy.

as to what I'm wearing.... a child's t-shirt with a picture of Tinkerbell. no bra though. my favorite baseball cap. camouflage  and tractors ftw! and a pair of black  jeans.

That sounds... tight. Is it cold in the room, by chance? 

[UmberIsSexy]

Like what... I mean it's Rock Band. I don't even think there are any sexy songs for the game.

hrmmm.... idk some people might find some of the songs sexy.

as to what I'm wearing.... a child's t-shirt with a picture of Tinkerbell. no bra though. my favorite baseball cap. camouflage  and tractors ftw! and a pair of black  jeans.

That sounds... tight. Is it cold in the room, by chance? 

I can't believe your sister voluntarily introduced you to this place haha!  We will now corrupt you like we have corrupted her!!  (or did she corrupt us? She's always posting nude around here!)

[Oddball]

I think we are corrupting each other chief

[RoninAngel]

Well, I don't think of it as corruption.

I for one think its taking "your first step into a larger world". 

Had an awesome time, saw a lot of my friends, got drunk without going overboard and the music was top notch. 

And good S&M play is all about communication. (Much like good sex!) It really comes down to the limits of the sub and what will end up being pleasurable for them.

So don't worry, I'll be gentle ;P

More then anyone esle here, you can say things that make me all hot Akashayi! 

So I have some questions:

I know not all S&M turns into sex, but like, if you go over to someone's place for a session, are they typically expecting and/or hoping for sex? Are you or the people you domintate (as the case may be) often disappionted when they don't get sex out of the deal? Is it an akward topic to discuss? Do you tend to just get it out of the way so no one has wrong expectations? What happens when someone is all horny after the session but you are not going to get it on?

[Smiles]

The thread. Like, why the fuck are we talking about video games when we should be talking about girl on girl action? 

cuz i hate yuri.

I'm wearing no pants no undies no bra and my birthday... massacre t-shirt

[NightWraith]

I claim yesterdays "old person who cant dress himself" prize for wearing a polo shirt inside out the entire day without noticing...

I mean I should of realised something was up when it was tricky to do some of the buttons up.. but no.

[akashayi]

Wait, Smiles, you hate Yuri? (And read flipside?)

[Oddball]

daft question time again who's yuri?  and back in my ex-army combats

[UmberIsSexy]

I claim yesterdays "old person who cant dress himself" prize for wearing a polo shirt inside out the entire day without noticing...

I mean I should of realised something was up when it was tricky to do some of the buttons up.. but no.

haha wow that is awesome.  hahahahaha

[CrystalDragonSpaceMarine]

daft question time again who's yuri?  and back in my ex-army combats

Yuri is the Japanese term for girl on girl sex/romance.

[RoninAngel]

YAY! YURI! MY FAVORITEST!