Author Topic: So I am a hypocrite. And sad. :(  (Read 10960 times)

Pozf

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Re: So I am a hypocrite. And sad. :(
« Reply #30 on: March 31, 2009, 02:10:45 pm »
Yes. And even if it was "primary" or "biological" humans are past that. If we're going to be natural and biological and primal all the way, then why don't we just quit thinking alltogether and go back to running on four legs.

Except that isn't human nature... No matter how advanced the human race, unless we evolve out of our mid-brain, we will never be "Past" our biological nature/instinct. Granted the bigger our upper brain gets, the instincts , from the mid-brain, are easier to ignore. But as of right now, people are fairly stupid, although able ignore their mid-brain. They generally don't.

I don't mean to offend anyone now, but in my opinion, wanting polygamy is a sign of immaturity.

This I do agree with, with additive, No self control.
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Emp_Dragon

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Re: So I am a hypocrite. And sad. :(
« Reply #31 on: March 31, 2009, 02:46:49 pm »
And how exactly is wanting polygamy a sign of immaturity?
And secondly, in that statement, how do you define polygamy?
Thirdly, how do you define the concept of immaturity?

My personal stance is that closed relationships with several partners can hardly be less mature than closed monogamous relationships, while open relationships could be, but doesn't nessessarily have to be.

UmberIsSexy

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Re: So I am a hypocrite. And sad. :(
« Reply #32 on: March 31, 2009, 02:53:03 pm »
Yes. And even if it was "primary" or "biological" humans are past that. If we're going to be natural and biological and primal all the way, then why don't we just quit thinking alltogether and go back to running on four legs.

Except that isn't human nature... No matter how advanced the human race, unless we evolve out of our mid-brain, we will never be "Past" our biological nature/instinct. Granted the bigger our upper brain gets, the instincts , from the mid-brain, are easier to ignore. But as of right now, people are fairly stupid, although able ignore their mid-brain. They generally don't.

This part here is very intriguing to me.  I know that very many of our psychological problems come from ignoring/fighting against our natures.  There was a time in my life when I made it my goal to not suppress anything emotionally, not to make myself "wrong" for having a certain thought or urge.  It can be very helpful to do so, in terms of creating happiness and becoming a stronger person.

However, I think I also agree with Razzly, though I'm too impatient to wait for her reasons before stating at least some of my thoughts.  I also think that the decision to remain monogamous is probably a decision made in maturity, as it allows for one to have a deeper, more meaningful relationship with one person, whether or not it also means that you have to suppress some natural urges.  On the other hand, a decision to remain "free" at the cost of never committing to one "serious" relationship seems more "immature" (not that immaturity is a bad thing.  In fact, before you are emotionally "mature", it's probably best to "fool around" a bit and try out some different things.  It will help you appreciate your monogamous relationship if you do end up with one, and also help you recognize and choose a good partner.  In my unprofessional observations, the teen years are probably when we're biologically ready for this, but the twenties are probably a more useful time due to the greater intellectual and emotional maturity and increased mental "settled-downedness".)

But is it possible to have as deep and meaningful of a relationship(s) with several people in a communal, polygamous, whatever way?  I don't see intrinsically why it is not.  In fact, in theory, I think it would take a more mature person to pull this off.  I know, I know, in theory.  My gut sorta tells me that this just won't work, and from what little I've heard and seen, it usually doesn't.

For some reason, the people I've met who are experimenting with this always seem to appear to be "immature" people. :-\ by that I mean, impulsive, quick to anger/jealousy, inclined to act and make decisions out of emotion (those are like all the same thing :-\), not sure what they want from life, etc.  At least from my upbringing, these are not qualities I'd aspire to, at least not as an adult.  I think they'd make for an uncomfortable and difficult life, basically.

oops, got ninja'd by Emp_Dragon..but it doesn't look like it nullifies my long-ass post or anything.  ::)  *looks down(up?)* see, I still kind of agree with what he's saying though, at least in theory! =P

Razzly

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Re: So I am a hypocrite. And sad. :(
« Reply #33 on: April 01, 2009, 02:48:18 am »
Well, UmberIsSexy basically hit the nail on the head, there.

I define polygamy as open relationships and closed relationships with many people involved. For example the old classic "one man and fifteen wives"-thing.

I don't really know what more to define here, since UIS put it all so nicely. But, ahem, yes. To be able to be with one person (at a time. I don't mind experimenting with many short relationships, especially not when you're a teenager. That's only healthy.) and have something meaningful together, is mature and shows that you have self control, and that you're mature enough to concentrate and give yourself fully to another. Wanting to run here and there and be with different people, unable to keep to that one person, seems... Impatient, reckless, greedy, non-thoughtful... All those are immature traits.

But I also have to mention that I am biased. I had a friend who was into polygamy once, and no one's ever hurt me as much as he did. I still want the bastard dead. Ahem.

EDIT: Still I hope that no one here takes this as a personal attack. I really don't want to start a fight. *Kisses to all*
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RoninAngel

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Re: So I am a hypocrite. And sad. :(
« Reply #34 on: April 01, 2009, 11:38:28 am »
Yeah. um... I don't agree.  :(

I think that breaking up with someone just becuase you like someone else is sortsighted.

I think if you can maintian the relationsonship your in... maintian it. Becuase really good relationships are not as common as everyone seems to think they are.
I got 99 problems but a nymphomaniac jester girl ain't one.

CrystalDragonSpaceMarine

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Re: So I am a hypocrite. And sad. :(
« Reply #35 on: April 01, 2009, 01:17:58 pm »
And how exactly is wanting polygamy a sign of immaturity?
And secondly, in that statement, how do you define polygamy?
Thirdly, how do you define the concept of immaturity?

My personal stance is that closed relationships with several partners can hardly be less mature than closed monogamous relationships, while open relationships could be, but doesn't nessessarily have to be.


I think the only immature aspect to it is when someone flips out on people for wanting monogamous relationships.
And vice versa for that matter.

Though, I've always thought of "mature/immature" as rather loaded terms.

Admiral Apocalypto

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Re: So I am a hypocrite. And sad. :(
« Reply #36 on: April 01, 2009, 01:46:55 pm »
I'm pretty sure the accepted definition of "mature" is "agrees with me".