Author Topic: Mistress Akasha's BDSM Playhouse  (Read 101135 times)

UmberIsSexy

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Mistress Akasha's BDSM Playhouse
« on: April 16, 2009, 12:38:01 pm »
This seems to be a popular topic here, and we have a few resident experts. :-*

All are welcomed to ask questions and learn everything you secretly wanted to know but were afraid to ask,

or just discuss :) :)

Be gentle! (or don't! Whatever!)

btw this thread is For Fun and Informativity, pls!  => ie. No being mean without first arranging a safe word.

BDSM linkies: :)
http://www.xeromag.com/fvbdsm.html
http://www.soulshaven.f2s.com/sub_collars.php3
« Last Edit: August 10, 2009, 08:33:50 pm by UmberIsSexy »

akashayi

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #1 on: April 16, 2009, 01:11:06 pm »
Right, my fun.


NightWraith

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #2 on: April 16, 2009, 03:29:12 pm »
Uh oh..

Anyway, as this thread has been started (and ignoring the fun part)... figure I may as well ask the similar minded others here,

After just over a years "break" from this kind of thing, due to various circumstances, my girlfriend and I have finally been able to get to a point where we can begin to get serious about this is a part of our relationship. As a year has gone past we've decided it would be best if we restarted things on the BDSM side and go at it from the beginning. Only snag is I cant find my big box-o-training-resources and "starter" material. (and I have a new PC with none of the old bookmarks either on it). So if anyone knows a good place to look for information, resources, etc on starting a BDSM based relationship, or any useful info on submissive or slave training (or has any advice to offer..) I've got my pencil ready to write it down... (and put it somewhere I wont loose it.. I hope).

Just feeling a bit rusty around the edges and want to "brush up" before things get going...

charles

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #3 on: April 16, 2009, 06:11:38 pm »
I'm not worthy! Thank you Mistress Akashayi!
CLAN OF THE CATS IS MAKING A COMEBACK! JUNE 8th.  BE THERE!

UmberIsSexy

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #4 on: April 16, 2009, 08:54:43 pm »
Right, my fun.



I think that means she just took control of the thread and it's about to get real. :o

and NightWraith, serious questions are totally fine.  By fun I just meant that people should be nice and not mean or abusive or anything.  Not that I can answer the questions, but hey, it's a good place for them.  Someone will probably know the stuff you seek.

Sounds exciting by the way...
« Last Edit: April 16, 2009, 09:02:14 pm by UmberIsSexy »

akashayi

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #5 on: April 16, 2009, 09:16:26 pm »
That's right.

Nightwraith, I flipped through some really good books on that went more into the relationship/mindset aspects last time I was at the Pleasure Chest. I can't remember the titles, I'll take note next time I'm there. :)

As far as a beginning book on Bondage/Scenes go, the Jay Wiseman's Erotic Bondage Handbook and Japanese Bondage by Midori are excellent resources.

...
So tell me, darling little Flipsiders, what do you think about knife play?

Not necessarily cutting, but when used for fun as an extra little ... incentive in a scene? :D


Pozf

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #6 on: April 16, 2009, 09:21:41 pm »
Incentive? I'm confused are you talking about like ... scenarios?
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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #7 on: April 17, 2009, 12:14:34 am »
right now on a break from BDSM got a lot of other things on. So that and my scuba diving has to take a back seat.  Ok do like knifes...but only as tools not for use in BDSM (strange thing is im not squimish cutting out a sliver out of my finger/hand)
« Last Edit: April 17, 2009, 12:34:27 am by Oddball »
What good is dreaming it if you don't actually do it?.

NightWraith

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #8 on: April 17, 2009, 12:49:11 am »
Akasha, thanks. The Bondage/Scene stuff I still have to hand more or less (or rather I know exactly where my books on that are). Although I'll have to get my hands on the Japanese Bondage book at some point as my girlfriend has suddenly become very keep on being photographed in that kind of ropework (arty photographs).

It's more the training/relationship aspect I'm interested in getting information on at the moment. The only source of the kind of info I've been looking for (but not all of it) is bestslavetraning.com but 1 resource is never enough...


As to knives.. not my cup of tea at all, and isnt something I've ever had a partner (sub or dom) interested in either. I'm sure for some the "threat" of a knife pushed to their skin is thrilling, but not for me.


charles

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #9 on: April 17, 2009, 03:44:35 am »
That's right.

Nightwraith, I flipped through some really good books on that went more into the relationship/mindset aspects last time I was at the Pleasure Chest. I can't remember the titles, I'll take note next time I'm there. :)

As far as a beginning book on Bondage/Scenes go, the Jay Wiseman's Erotic Bondage Handbook and Japanese Bondage by Midori are excellent resources.

...
So tell me, darling little Flipsiders, what do you think about knife play?

Not necessarily cutting, but when used for fun as an extra little ... incentive in a scene? :D


Oh Mistress. May beg that your beautiful, delicate blades remove these shabby excuse for clothes that I dare to show myself in, before your glorious presence
CLAN OF THE CATS IS MAKING A COMEBACK! JUNE 8th.  BE THERE!

UmberIsSexy

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #10 on: April 17, 2009, 06:30:57 am »
I think we need a couple links maybe in the first post, because some of us *raises hand* really have no idea what the whole thing is about.  I'm hoping for something cooler than Wikipedia.  Any suggestions?

NightWraith

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #11 on: April 17, 2009, 07:32:25 am »
I think we need a couple links maybe in the first post, because some of us *raises hand* really have no idea what the whole thing is about.  I'm hoping for something cooler than Wikipedia.  Any suggestions?

Try this one:

http://www.xeromag.com/fvbdsm.html

Emp_Dragon

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #12 on: April 17, 2009, 08:26:20 am »
Ulike most other who has answered, I find edge-play really exciting, (not just knifes but any clean, as in cleaned with rubbing alcohol, sharp object could be used)

Oddball

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #13 on: April 17, 2009, 08:30:09 am »
Here's one I've found usuefull:

http://www.soulshaven.f2s.com/sub_collars.php3
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CrystalDragonSpaceMarine

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #14 on: April 17, 2009, 09:13:57 am »
I'm completely against BDSM. It's a mockery!

Used to be you could torture the hell out of people and scare with these bloody racks, 'n' shit.

Nowadays, with all the sick masochist freaks out there, you find people that actually get off on it! What's a wrench-monkey to do?

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #15 on: April 17, 2009, 09:36:20 am »
well you could always go the opposite way and.......bring out the comfy Cushions

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UmberIsSexy

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #16 on: April 17, 2009, 09:58:35 am »
Oddball you evil fecking bastard!!!

What's a "scene"?

RoninAngel

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #17 on: April 17, 2009, 10:49:19 am »
That's right.

Nightwraith, I flipped through some really good books on that went more into the relationship/mindset aspects last time I was at the Pleasure Chest. I can't remember the titles, I'll take note next time I'm there. :)

As far as a beginning book on Bondage/Scenes go, the Jay Wiseman's Erotic Bondage Handbook and Japanese Bondage by Midori are excellent resources.

...
So tell me, darling little Flipsiders, what do you think about knife play?

Not necessarily cutting, but when used for fun as an extra little ... incentive in a scene? :D



It was reaaaaaaly hot when they did it in Kushiel's Dart.   :-[ :-*  :-[


But I think cutting might be > my ability to be courageous.  :o

Otherwise, props are fine. They make this whole thing extra special right?
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akashayi

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #18 on: April 17, 2009, 02:09:47 pm »
Charles, alright. Since you asked so nicely.

That's a really great resource, Nightwraith. I think it has a really good explanation of a lot of things for people who are completely unfamiliar with/new to the scene. In fact, I've already been able to share it with someone.

Did you see the Dungeon Rules page linked from there? http://www.xeromag.com/fvbdrules.html
When thou dost come unto me and beseech me, saying, "Verily, do I request of you a good paddling," then surely I will grant unto thee a good paddling. During the period of the paddling, thou shalt not say unto me "What was that, a mosquito?", nor compare thy paddling to the flight of any other insect, or any creeping thing upon the earth, be it a moth, or a caterpillar; nor draw any likeness between the instrument of thy paddling and the feathers of the birds above; for surely shalt thy paddling grow mighty and endless, and welts shall be upon thy backside for four and thirty days. (etc)

I'm still cracking up over here. Brilliant. Need to print that out on nice paper with a nice font and frame it. Buahaha.

Regarding knives, I've always liked sharp shiny things outside of play. I have a fitting arsenal to take on any zombie outbreaks that might occur here in Los Angeles. Adding them into play seemed a natural evolution of that. It's a good thing a lot of my friends also like sharp, shiny things. :)

Next question, my lovely forumites:
How do you feel about asphyxiation and/or choking?

UmberIsSexy

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #19 on: April 17, 2009, 02:24:40 pm »
k....rkk

*GASP* well I think it could be awesome.  I mean, if you're getting "done" at the same time...I would imagine that would be pretty intense.  Is it good for you though?  I'd imagine prob. not that bad, usually things that are bad for you in large quantities are good for you in small quantities...or something like that.

RoninAngel

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #20 on: April 17, 2009, 04:42:18 pm »
Hmmm... You would have to trust someone absolutely.  :(

Like more then other bondage senerios. Like, you could die or pass out or have brain damage pretty easy.
They might not even mean to hurt you, but they may do it on accedent. I'd rather just give a rimjob or something.  :-\

I hold my breath when I'm coming a lot though, so UIS is right, it would be intense.

Edit: You guys when straight into the hard stuff, I was hoping to cuddle first!  :o
But seriously, maybe I'm not hardcore enough for this tread.
« Last Edit: April 17, 2009, 04:53:16 pm by RoninAngel »
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Pozf

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #21 on: April 17, 2009, 05:10:06 pm »
Asphyxiation can actually cause orgasm in men. When they used to hang people the undertakers would find that some men had ejaculated when being hung. I no longer remember the scientific explanation for this.

And what you didn't expect them to go straight into the more Hardcore stuff?   :P

I dunno I could probably get into the scene if I can ever go that far. Don't know if I would end up sub or Dom... Probably switch hit.
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UmberIsSexy

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #22 on: April 17, 2009, 07:20:53 pm »
I hold my breath when I'm coming a lot though,
Really?  Does your partner ever notice and joke about it or anything?
Edit: You guys when straight into the hard stuff, I was hoping to cuddle first!  :o
But seriously, maybe I'm not hardcore enough for this tread.
If it makes you feel better, I'm definitely not hardcore enough for this thread.  I do like to learn about stuff though.  And anyway Mistress only asked us our feelings about it.  She didn't say we had to get choked right away or anything. ;)

I hear what you're saying though - I would not be into this.  I just tried choking myself gently and it was pretty uncomfortable - it hurts.  Maybe there's a certain technique.  I'm generally not into anything though that's going to leave me sore afterwards, and I just have no need to be choked or stuff like that. :P  Even anal stuff is like a level of intensity that I don't really need or want to go to usually.  edit: to me, it's very nice to keep it simple, in terms of sensations, you know?  but I can see perhaps bringing in a little make believe, some mental games in my extremely monogamous future :| :]  I think we'll get a little more freaky when the kids get a little older and don't need us quite as much (I still have a little baby...it's all we can do sometimes to keep up with the housework and get enough sleep)

Pozf you could get into the scene you think?  I'm..a little surprised.  Not that I know you that well or anything.
« Last Edit: April 17, 2009, 07:32:06 pm by UmberIsSexy »

akashayi

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #23 on: April 17, 2009, 07:57:02 pm »
Well, honestly the way I go about choking someone for real in martial arts/whatever and in bed are completely different. There are different ways to go about this. Slight asphyxiation and choking also yield different results in play. The first leads to a sort of erotic high, while the second causes more of a flight or fight response and leads to the pumping of adrenaline.

I think the best fun is asphyxiation in a sexual situation, it can greatly enhance orgasms. If you're into that sort of thing. I've been on the receiving end of this as well. I can definitely say that gently cutting of part of the oxygen supply in bed can lead to a certain erotic high.

Also, just because you're not into the 'hardcore' sides of bdsm, doesn't mean a little bit of kink might not be right for you. It's not like everyone in the scene is into all the same stuff. It's just like anything else- Anal, for instance, isn't for everyone-  even though it's great fun for others.

Honestly, if you don't trust someone that completely, you shouldn't even have them dom you in lighter ways. What I appreciate the most about bdsm experiences (other than being an evil, evil sadist) is the level of trust and connection involved. I think that might be the key for you Pozf, is just finding someone you can trust 100%, bdsm or no. Whenever that happens. There's no real rush!

Ok cuties, then here's a softer question.
Have any of you played with bondage in sex, or thought about it? Anything from fluffy handcuffs and belts to delicious hemp rope hog ties and full suspension, we're talking immobilization. Does this excite you?

I highly suggest you all pick up some bondage tape and do some research with a few 'quickies' and report back with your mathematical analysis. XD

Pozf

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #24 on: April 17, 2009, 08:18:43 pm »
I think that might be the key for you Pozf, is just finding someone you can trust 100%, bdsm or no. Whenever that happens. There's no real rush!

That's just my problem, there is very little trust left here.

Have any of you played with bondage in sex, or thought about it? Anything from fluffy handcuffs and belts to delicious hemp rope hog ties and full suspension, we're talking immobilization. Does this excite you?

I would NOT enjoy not being able to move, that I know for a fact. [Speculation] Immobilization to certain area's... I dunno, quite possibly, but I'd not know until I try [/speculation]
« Last Edit: April 18, 2009, 12:15:53 am by Pozf »
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charles

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #25 on: April 17, 2009, 10:23:03 pm »
fluffy hand-cuffs, tied to a chair... ummmm... tied to the bed, spanking, biting... drunken (i.e. purposely got drunk off our faces to have a go at it.  Many of you might have tried this involuntarily but it can be a lot of fun and giggles as long as you don't drink to illness).

That is it my Mistress.  May this unworthy toad humbly request what thou hath done?
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Emp_Dragon

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #26 on: April 17, 2009, 10:49:54 pm »
My ex and I were both a bit switch, so we sometimes wrestled in bed while tying to tie eachother up, usually with strips of cloth or thick leather, we also experimented a little bit with asphyxiation, a nine tails (she'd made it). With my current GF we havn't really experimented at all in that direction, we are still no done exploring eachother in the conventional sense yet. But our 'storytelling' over the phone and letters is much further gone. :-*

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #27 on: April 18, 2009, 12:01:39 am »
There's a bar in Chicago called "The Exit" with "Bondage night" on Thursdays.

Curiosity prompted me to view the proceedings thereof. Tho I did not partake.

NightWraith

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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #28 on: April 18, 2009, 03:36:08 am »
Asphyxiation is one of those scarey things as far as I'm concerned, not something I'd do or want doe to be tbh.

Umber, it needs context. Just strangling yourself and expecting to "get excited" by it is not going to work. It's just part of a whole set of stimulus.

Bondage on the other hand, yup been there done that both ways. I usually restrict my gf in some way for/during sex, either bondage, or just holding her wrists together over her head. Suspension isnt something we've done, partly due to her weight and partly due to the fact that there's nothing to make secure anchor points on in my flat, is something on the todo list though.

Dont have handcuffs as such. But we do have a set of single wrist and ankle cuffs (the kind that need to be clipped together to work as a restrictive device), best things ever for "quick" bondage. Although taking time with rope can be more fun.

What I appreciate the most about bdsm experiences (other than being an evil, evil sadist) is the level of trust and connection involved.

Same here. It's so much deeper and well, more rewarding, than anything you can get through being vanilla.


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Re: BDSM play
« Reply #29 on: April 18, 2009, 05:25:30 am »
When I did have a Mistress I trusted her completly and felt safe that She would not cross any boundaries that we had talked about earlier.  would go on  and explain things further but Im starting to shut down and fall asleep over the key board  :(
What good is dreaming it if you don't actually do it?.